Overwhelmed

I feel almost overwhelmed right now. I finished holiday and birthday gifts and even got a couple of comfort quilts out. Last night I made bone broth (which needs to cook 24 hours and is done). I brought out another BOM which is no longer a mystery because I am behind. Then I realized I have a lot of BOMs that are behind. 

Is it the changing seasons? I've been looking at the archetypes of being female, woman. I wanted to skip the SORCERESS and find myself with her right now. She is portrayed as crazy, unpredictable and wild. I wonder what is wrong with those attributes?

I looked online for images of the Sorceress and selected this one from a group on Pinterest. (https://www.pinterest.com/margelle/wise-women-healers/?lp=true). First of all, if I am to embody the energy personally and in my quilting, it has to resonate with me. This archetype isn't doing magick for others, she isn't in front of a group of people, and she's not DOING the energy the way she did when she was younger, when she served her community. 

I decided to grow out my gray hair. For awhile, I had one side cut close and spiked it, and now it is playing catch up to the longer side. It may never hang down my back as in the pic, but it can be a goal for my elder years to look elderly.

The Sorceress, according to a number of books I've been reading*, looks at the bones of her life, not so much to review what she said or did, but to find the deeper self. So symbolically, I have been pulling out the Hallows decor bones as a reminder of the work I need to do now. It is about healing one's self.

* WOMEN WHO RUN WITH THE WOLVES, by Estes, THE CIRCLE OF LIFE by Davis & Leonard. Both refer to other books and other stories, legends and myths.

When I looked for examples in movies or as the protagonist in books, it surprised me that mainstream wants to make a joke about all elderly women in those stages beyond being a mother. Even the movie, THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA, Meryl's character breaks down as her personal power breaks down. She is replaced by younger execs in her field and we end up feeling sorry for her. FIRST WIVES joined 3 of them (those in the Sorceress Archetype) but lordy how they battled for their rights! I was quite disheartened. 

So when I say I am overwhelmed, its that I know so much about me has changed. I am fueled by a different sort of energy that I am working hard to understand. Gathering bones, looking at them symbolically is my way of seeing that the flesh of who I was has fallen away and if I am going to restore any sense of life and rebuild it for however many days are left to me, I better find my deeper self. Maybe this was a lot for a quilting review of the day, obtuse, confusing. Now you see why I am overwhelmed!!! Its hard to make sense of something where there is no guidebook, no mentor.