Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Day 7 - Not Quilting

Sometimes its difficult to give people your honest opinions. Perhaps that comes from a fear of rejection, or fear of not fitting in, or fear of criticism for how and what you believe. Bottom line is that we often do not think we are enough.

That has been a huge issue for me. While I still get anxious in many ways, I often find myself either mentally or physically snapping my fingers at my own silly self and moving along. Life is too short to be caught in trauma drama.

This is the last of my 'Not Quilting' days. My first plan for today was to paint the outside of my two entry doors, but I could not find painters' tape, so this is a job for another time. 

It is still risky for me to be in close proximity to my quilting projects, even though this is the last day of my time away from them. Luckily, they got put behind closet doors so are out of sight/out of mind.

As I walked into my studio, it was apparent spending time in here cleaning, and clearing would be a good thing. There were still magazines to go through or at least put on a corner shelf in here. There were papers to sort and either file or toss. All of them were on my work station and so had to go somewhere before I could even start quilting again. I smiled wondering if this had been a sub-conscious plan all along and that I need to trick myself into some behaviors or actions.

My writing desk was cluttered too. The stack of books to list was going to take me more than one sitting to get it done. That process is so very time consuming. The process for Amazon seller's listings have changed so I spent a fair amount of time learning how they want it done now. I am able to get at least 5 of them done at one time, and just estimating what is in these overflowing boxes might be close to 100 more. 

I worked for two publishing houses when I lived in MN editing their raw manuscripts. They sent me huge boxes of product, a lot of which stayed in the shrink wrap or didn't come with boxes. I got almost 20 listed this time, but it is a lot of work to follow the links, compare prices and click to sell.

And then there is the shelf I use to hold Swap-bot exchanges. What a mess that got to be. Every time I go through it to organize, things get put in a logical order. Then I join a different kind of swap and everything changes. Needless to say, my attention is drawn to this room like a recovering alcoholic tending bar.

I do not consider myself a recovering quilter just because I took a time out. I intend to quilt again.

One by one, as the piles were handled, the bookcase in here was organized with all my 'absolute keeper' books and things, the work station was cleared off. Papers were sorted for filing, Swap-bot projects got separated out from family photos & cards and everything was put into a more reasonable system on that shelf unit. I found more items to list for sale as I went through the 'keeper' books and put them in alpha order.

Everything got dusted. Wait. What?